Culture shapes performance [#12]
Or how where you're from influences how you act in subtle ways
Dear reader,
“Where are you from?”
This is one of the hardest questions someone can ask me. It’s a complex one, and one I can go down a rabbit hole the asker may not actually care about. So much so, I have three layers I tell, based on how genuinely interested the person is, and what the context lends itself to.
I could tell you I am Swiss-Brazilian, or I could give you three generations of immigration and relocation and how they all eventually somehow make sense.
In reality, we often downgrade those facts about our heritage and family history to helpful background information, information that brings some colour to understanding another human, but that fails to acknowledge that these things shape, in a very fundamental way, our thought patterns and our actions.
Here, I’m not thinking about the obvious of what our parents teach us, or the trauma we may have dealt with, or some marking experiences that shaped us at an individual level. I’m talking at a far greater, macro level as it were.
When you open your eyes to it, you may start to notice your own patterns, and how examples abound all over. As awareness is the first step to unlocking and harnessing the potential of who we are, this can be a rather transformative experience.
Let me give you a couple of examples of how our wider context can shape our view of the world and harness this in our favour.
1 - The structure of language
Portuguese is my native tongue (here I am being, literal, it is the language of the land I was born in). In Portuguese, there are two verbs for To Be. Ser and Estar.
When we translate anything from Portuguese to English, those two To Be merge into one. However, saying “I am sad” can mean two very different things.
Eu estou Triste means that in the present moment, right now, I am sad. It’s a current state, it’s how I feel at this point in time, but not necessarily who I am.
Eu sou Triste means that I am, fundamentally, a sad person. This is part of my identity, of how I see and present myself.
In one situation, I am temporarily, transitorily sad, in the other, I define myself as a sad person. Yet, both translate to “I am sad” in English, and the nuance is lost.
In the above example, the identity type of “To Be” doesn’t sound right in Portuguese, so let me give you a more tangible example.
I could say that I am overweight (this is, at the time of writing, factually true). However, I can say that I estou overweight, as in, I am currently above my ideal weight or I can say that I sou overweight, as in, I am an overweight person, being overweight is part of who I am, of my identity, of my personality.
That’s a rather sharp contrast.
This is a fundamental distinction. One where the dissociation allows you to change the statement without changing your identity.
If we dissociate the adjective from the identity, we are far more likely to be able to make a change to the temporary situation. The day I started realising I was a healthy person who happened to be overweight, something changed, and I have been improving ever since.
Another great example of this is a fascinating TED Talk by behavioural economist Keith Chen titled Could your language affect your ability to save money?
In it, he highlights that languages like Mandarin which do not separate the past and the present tense are associated with greater saving rates, in contrast to languages with Germanic or Latin roots. Gus in 10 years time is not me, he’s a different person, therefore it’s a lot harder to deprive myself to benefit a stranger. However, if your language does not have this grammatical distinction, you are less likely to see that future self as someone else, and therefore, saving now is saving for you (which, obviously, would be the correct and rational way to look at it!)
2. Cultural references
My formative years were spent almost exclusively in a French-speaking environment (you can start to see the story getting complex, right?).
My cultural references are heavily influenced by this, despite a very deep-rooted desire to remain close to Brazilian culture.
I have a very tangible example that I have carried with me through my entire career and still frequently use - it is unlikely someone will work closely with me for an extended period of time and never hear it.
Coluche was arguably France’s greatest comedian of all time. I’ve never actually seen any of his sketches and yet, there is one of his signature lines that I frequently come back to, because of how prevalent it was in general conversation.
Coluche used to say “C’est pas parce qu’ils sont nombreux a avoir tord, qu’ils ont raison”
This translates roughly to “Many people being wrong doesn’t make them right”
This is something I have often said when challenging established assumptions or challenging people to dig deeper into the data to ensure we knew what was actually happening. This small sentence also helped me greatly in accepting that I may have a different opinion to the masses and it does not necessarily mean that I am wrong (or right, for that matter).
There may be other such sayings from your upbringing or where you live that morphed into part of how you see the world.
Over to you
Those are just a few examples of how your wider environment, just not your personal upbringing, can provide you with a different perspective, especially in a multicultural marketplace. Immerse yourself back in your home culture, wherever that may be, contemplate your own mother tongue (even if it’s English) and explore and try and seek meaning out of it.
At the very least, that contemplation can be cathartic, and at best, it may unlock your next transformation.
As usual - if you have any reflections, join in the conversation!
Your post got me thinking about how words don’t just influence others—they shape us, too. Often, we believe our view of the world is molded solely by culture, but it also comes down to personal perception built on your experiences. If I believe this article is great, then it will be, for me; if I think otherwise, no amount of effort on your part will make me like it.
My spoken English isn’t always perfect, though my Italian is. However, I feel disconnected from many aspects of my own culture. This is because I’ve learned to reflect inwardly and filter the words I tell myself in Italian and English each day, allowing me to shed the limiting beliefs that were holding me back. One Portuguese word I say sometimes to random portoguese restaurant is Pastel de nata and, someone might feel offended because I wrote the word “Portuguese” in lowercase, but these are small details that don’t truly define communication…whether with others or with oneself. They’re just beliefs that people carry with them, beliefs that can harm relationships and create identities that often leave people feeling dissatisfied.
Words matter not only in how we use them with others but also in how we use them with ourselves. What tale do you weave for yourself each day, Gus, that shapes and sways you, for better or worse?
If you’re interested in diving deeper into this, I’d recommend The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, which explores how beliefs can shape us, and Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman, to understand how our thinking patterns affect every perception. Highly recommended!